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♪ FROZEN IN A TIME AND SPACE DIVIDE ♪

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♪ BUT HOW WOULD THE UNIVERSE SURVIVE ♪

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♪ DUCK DODGERS OF THE 24th AND 1/2 CENTURY ♪

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♪ PROTECTING THE POWERLESS AND THE WEAK ♪

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♪ DUCK DODGERS, HE'S FIGHTING TYRANNY ♪

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♪ IN THE 24th AND 1/2 CENTURY ♪

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- TONIGHT ON "EVIL ALERT DAILY,"

8
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THE MAGNIFICENT ROGUE
HAS HIS EYES ON A NEW PRIZE,

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"E.A.D." HAS AN EXCLUSIVE
FRONT-ROW SEAT

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FOR AN EXCLUSIVE
PRESS CONFERENCE

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FEATURING THE MOST EXCLUSIVE
TROUBLEMAKER OF THEM ALL.

12
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- MY NEXT TARGET WILL BE...

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EARTH. IS THAT HOW YOU SAY IT?

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ALSO, YES,

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I AM DATING THE TOP 5
SUPERMODELS IN THE UNIVERSE...

16
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AT ONCE.

17
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THANK YOU.

18
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- OK, YOU'RE ALL
HOSTAGES UNTIL LUNCH,

19
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AND WE HAVE MAGNIFICENT ROGUE
HATS AND STICKERS FOR SALE.

20
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- WHOA! STICKERS!
- WHERE?

21
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- THE MAGNIFICENT ROGUE.

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FEH! WHO'S HE THINK HE IS,

23
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STRUTTING AROUND THE UNIVERSE
LIKE HE OWNS THE JOINT.

24
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HAVE YOU EVER SEEN SOMEBODY

25
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WHO'S MORE IN LOVE
WITH HIMSELF, CADET?

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- UH, POSSIBLY, SIR.

27
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- CONTACT I.Q.

28
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WE'VE GOT A V.I.P. TO T.N.T.

29
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GREETINGS, CHIEF.

30
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JUST WANTED YOU TO KNOW

31
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I'VE GOT THIS MAGNIFICENT ROGUE
SITUATION COVERED.

32
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HE WON'T GET WITHIN
50 MILES OF EARTH.

33
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IT'S LIKE THAT RESTRAINING ORDER
YOU FILED AGAINST ME AS A JOKE.

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REMEMBER?

35
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- THAT WASN'T A JOKE.

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- HA HA! PRICELESS! HA HA HA!

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- WOW.

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THAT'S A NICE SECRET LAIR.

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- CHIEF, ARE YOU
LISTENING TO ME?

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- FINE WORK, DODGERS. TOP NOTCH.

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- WAIT!

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ARE YOU WATCHING "E.A.D."?

43
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- WHAT?! THAT'S PREPOSTEROUS!

44
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WHY?

45
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ARE YOU WATCHING "E.A.D."?

46
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- ME?! MINDLESS GOSSIP?

47
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NO WAY!

48
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- NOT THAT I'D BLAME
SOMEONE FOR WATCHING,

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YOU KNOW, FOR TIPS
ON STOPPING VILLAINS,

50
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AND FASHION.

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- HE MUST BE STOPPED,

52
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PERFECTLY-STYLED HAIR AND ALL.

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- EXACTLY.

54
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A GLEAMING SMILE
AND HAUNTING EYES

55
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DON'T GIVE YOU THE RIGHT
TO TERRORIZE THE UNIVERSE.

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- YEAH, YEAH.

57
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HE'S ONE HANDSOME D-DEV-D-D...

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OH, HE'S A SCOUNDREL ALL RIGHT.

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- WELL, DODGERS,
YOU KNOW YOUR MISSION...

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STOP THE MAGNIFICENT ROGUE
BY ANY MEANS NECESSARY...

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AND, UH, GET HIS AUTOGRAPH
AND SOME T-SHIRTS

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WHILE YOU'RE AT IT.

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- SIR, IS THIS THE RIGHT PLANET?

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- NO, ASSISTANT.

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IT'S A BLUE PLANET.

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IF I WANT TO MENACE
A RED PLANET,

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I'LL SAY "RED PLANET."

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- OH. YES, OF COURSE,
YOUR MAGNIFICENCE.

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- AND WHERE'S
THE POPCORN I WANTED

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BUT NEVER ASKED FOR?

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- SIR, WE'RE BEING HAILED

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BY A GALACTIC PROTECTORATE SHIP.

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- REDUCE YOUR SPEED
AND PREPARE TO BE BOARDED.

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- IT'S HIM. IT'S HIM!

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IT'S REALLY HIM!

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- GET AHOLD OF YOURSELF, CADET.

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- OH, DON'T BE TOO HARD ON HIM.

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HIS PURITY AND INNOCENCE
ARE GIFTS TO BE CHERISHED.

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- SWEET TALK WON'T FLY

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WITH BATTLE-SCARRED VETS
LIKE US, CHUCKLES.

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OK, THEN.

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YOU ARE HEREBY ORDERED BY
THE GALACTIC PROTECTORATE

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TO VACATE THIS QUADRANT...

84
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IMMEDIATELY.

85
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UNLESS YOU WANT TO STAY.

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IT'S YOUR CALL.

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- SIR, I THINK WE SHOULD LEAVE.

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- REALLY?

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IS THAT WHAT YOU THINK?

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THAT'S FASCINATING.

91
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WELL, WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THIS?

92
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YOU'RE FIRED.

93
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- REALLY?!

94
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PLEASE DON'T TOY WITH ME.

95
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- GET OUT!

96
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- FREEDOM!

97
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- HE SAID HE WAS MY BIGGEST FAN.

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OBVIOUSLY, HE'S NOT.

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THAT'S ALL FOR TODAY, GIRLS.

100
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- I'LL SAY.

101
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A REAL FAN WOULDN'T ABANDON YOU

102
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WHILE YOU WERE BEING WRONGFULLY
PERSECUTED BY THE LAW.

103
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- UH, W-WHAT?

104
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I THOUGHT YOU CAME HERE
TO ARREST HIM.

105
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- ARREST ME?

106
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HEAVENS.

107
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IF ADDING A DASH OF PIZZAZZ

108
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TO MILLIONS OF OTHERWISE
BLAND LIVES IS A CRIME,

109
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THEN, BY ALL MEANS,
LOCK ME UP FOR GOOD.

110
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- WOW. THAT WAS EASY.

111
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NOW, BEFORE WE CUFF YOU,

112
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CAN I GET AN AUTOGRAPH?

113
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OH, AND A PICTURE
OF US TOGETHER?

114
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OOH, OOH!
AND MAYBE SOME FREE MUGS,

115
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KEY CHAINS, AND SNOW GLOBES?

116
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- NOTHING WOULD MAKE ME HAPPIER

117
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THAN TEMPORARILY ELEVATING
YOUR DREARY EXISTENCES

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WITH TRIVIAL SOUVENIRS
OF MY MAGNIFICENCE,

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LIKE THESE REFRIGERATOR MAGNETS,
FOR INSTANCE.

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- OOH! MAGNETS!
- OOH! MAGNETS!

121
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- HOWEVER,

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BEFORE I SURRENDER THESE,

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OR MYSELF TO YOUR CUSTODY,

124
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I HAVE A FEW TINY FAVORS
TO ASK OF YOU.

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- NAME IT, AND IT'S DONE!

126
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JUST A FEW SIMPLE TASKS

127
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AND MAGNIFICENT ROGUE
WILL BE MY PAL FOREVER!

128
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YOU'RE NOT SO BAD, ARE YOU,
LITTLE FELLA?

129
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IT'S NOT LIKE YOU'RE A...

130
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COLOSSAL, TERRIFYING BEAST

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SUMMONED FROM THE DEPTHS
OF MY DARKEST NIGHTMARE.

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AAH!

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- I SAID I WANTED
A POPCORN QUESADILLA.

134
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THAT DOESN'T MEAN I STILL
WANT A POPCORN QUESADILLA.

135
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HEY! HE'S RIGHT!

136
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THIS IS BETTER THAN
USING A SPONGE!

137
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- NO, NO, NO.

138
00:06:32,826 --> 00:06:34,594
THESE BUBBLES TICKLE.

139
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DRAIN THE POOL AGAIN.

140
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AND THIS TIME,
USE TICKLE-FREE BUBBLES!

141
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- ENOUGH IS ENOUGH!

142
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IT'S TIME TO SURREND-DA-DA-DA...

143
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SURREN-DA-DA-DA...

144
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TURN YOURSELF IN!

145
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- YOU KNOW WHAT I LIKE, CADET?

146
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- YOURSELF AND ELABORATE
RECIPES INVOLVING P-POPCORN?

147
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- WELL, YES.

148
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GUILTY AS CHARGED.

149
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BUT BESIDES THAT,

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I LIKE THIS EARTH

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BECAUSE IT'S BLUE.

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YOU SEE, BLUE IS
MY FAVORITE COLOR.

153
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- B-BLUE
IS A GOOD COLOR FOR YOU.

154
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IT COMPLEMENTS YOUR EYES NICELY.

155
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- WELL, TELL ME ABOUT IT.

156
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UNFORTUNATELY...

157
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EARTH IS NOT QUITE
BLUE ENOUGH FOR MY TASTES,

158
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SO I'VE DECIDED
TO BRING ITS MOON CLOSER.

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IT'LL MAKE EARTH
COMPLETELY BLUE.

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NEAT, HUH?

161
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- Y-YOU'RE COMPLETELY INSANE.

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- TRUE.

163
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BUT I'M ALSO
COMPLETELY IN CONTROL.

164
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- MY TONGUE IS LOSING
IT'S MAGICAL LUSTER.

165
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CAN YOU TAKE A LOOK AT IT?

166
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MAY I REST NOW,
YOUR MAGNIFICENCE?

167
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- THAT DEPENDS.

168
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CAN YOU SEE MY REFLECTION
IN THE FLOOR?

169
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- WHY IS DODGERS BEING SO NICE
TO THE MAGNIFICENT ROGUE?

170
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HE DOESN'T THINK
THE MAGNIFICENT ROGUE

171
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IS A BETTER ENEMY
THAN I AM, DOES HE?

172
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IS IT THAT SHIP?

173
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I COULD FLY A SHIP
LIKE THAT IF I WANTED.

174
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- NO.

175
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THIS ISN'T ABOUT...

176
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UH, CAPTAIN DODGERS
DID MENTION SOMETHING

177
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ABOUT A N-NEW ARCHENEMY.

178
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- I BELIEVE THE WORD
HE USED WAS...

179
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MAGNIFICENT.

180
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- I GOT THOSE CABLES HOOKED
AROUND THE MOON, M.R.

181
00:08:35,650 --> 00:08:37,684
NOW, HOW ABOUT WE CALL
SOME PEOPLE I KNOW

182
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AND ACT LIKE OLD PALS?

183
00:08:38,752 --> 00:08:40,053
- I HAVE A BETTER IDEA.

184
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WE'LL USE THE CABLES
YOU'VE ATTACHED THE MOON

185
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TO TOW IT CLOSER TO EARTH.

186
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- I DON'T SEE HOW THAT WILL SHOW
PEOPLE WHAT GREAT PALS WE ARE.

187
00:08:48,095 --> 00:08:49,296
PLUS, IF WE MOVE IT,

188
00:08:49,363 --> 00:08:51,131
WE MIGHT GET A TICKET
OR SOMETHING.

189
00:08:51,198 --> 00:08:52,899
- HOW UNFORTUNATE.

190
00:08:52,966 --> 00:08:54,869
I WAS THINKING THAT AFTERWARDS,

191
00:08:54,936 --> 00:08:59,936
WE COULD CELEBRATE BY CO-HOSTING
ONE OF MY MAGNIFICENT PARTIES...

192
00:09:00,573 --> 00:09:01,574
TOGETHER.

193
00:09:01,641 --> 00:09:02,642
- A-LIST ONLY?

194
00:09:02,709 --> 00:09:04,678
- EVERYONE BUT YOU.

195
00:09:04,744 --> 00:09:06,394
- WHOO-HOO!

196
00:09:14,755 --> 00:09:17,090
- PROFESSOR, I THINK
THE MOON IS GETTING BIGGER.

197
00:09:17,157 --> 00:09:18,492
- YES, KEITH.

198
00:09:18,559 --> 00:09:20,594
IT'S A TELESCOPE.
IT'S SUPPOSED TO DO THAT.

199
00:09:20,661 --> 00:09:25,661
THAT'S WHY YOU'RE
NOT ALLOWED TO THINK.

200
00:09:27,735 --> 00:09:29,870
- PLEASE,
CAPTAIN GLOUSTERMAN, SIR,

201
00:09:29,936 --> 00:09:31,805
I THINK WE MUST TURN BACK NOW.

202
00:09:31,872 --> 00:09:33,374
THE STORM IS FAR TOO MIGHTY.

203
00:09:33,440 --> 00:09:36,076
- AW, I DON'T CARE
IF IT'S A PERFECT STORM,

204
00:09:36,143 --> 00:09:37,411
DANDY BOY BLUE.

205
00:09:37,478 --> 00:09:39,513
CAPTAIN GLOUSTERMAN
DELIVERS HIS FISH FRESH.

206
00:09:39,580 --> 00:09:42,582
THAT'S WHY YOU'RE
NOT ALLOWED TO THINK.

207
00:09:42,649 --> 00:09:45,086
AAH!

208
00:09:45,153 --> 00:09:48,422
- SO, I'LL BE CEMENTED INTO
THE WALLS OF YOUR GAZEBO,

209
00:09:48,489 --> 00:09:51,124
BUT I'M STILL
THE CO-HOST, RIGHT?

210
00:09:51,191 --> 00:09:51,941
WHOA!

211
00:09:57,598 --> 00:10:01,348
- INCREASE TO FULL POWER.

212
00:10:02,971 --> 00:10:04,838
- IF THE KNOB WON'T
TURN ANY FURTHER,

213
00:10:04,905 --> 00:10:08,976
THAT'S FULL POWER, RIGHT?

214
00:10:09,042 --> 00:10:11,011
- PERHAPS WE'RE TOO HEAVY.

215
00:10:11,078 --> 00:10:13,347
ASSISTANT, TAKE OUT THE TRASH.

216
00:10:13,414 --> 00:10:16,584
- YEAH, OLD M.R. AND I GO
WAY BACK, MR. CRUISE.

217
00:10:16,651 --> 00:10:19,420
I DON'T KNOW IF I'D USE
THE PHRASE "BEST FRIENDS,"

218
00:10:19,487 --> 00:10:21,188
BUT YOU CERTAINLY COULD.

219
00:10:21,255 --> 00:10:22,656
MAY I CALL YOU TOM?

220
00:10:22,722 --> 00:10:23,957
MR. CRUISE?

221
00:10:24,024 --> 00:10:27,474
OK, HOW ABOUT MAVERICK?

222
00:10:34,735 --> 00:10:36,937
WE'RE LIGHT
AS A FEATHER NOW, M.R.

223
00:10:37,004 --> 00:10:39,306
I TOSSED EVERY LAST BAG.

224
00:10:39,373 --> 00:10:42,809
- WHY DON'T YOU RUN OUTSIDE
AND UNHOOK US

225
00:10:42,876 --> 00:10:43,844
WHILE I DO NOTHING.

226
00:10:43,910 --> 00:10:46,160
- WORKS FOR ME.

227
00:10:58,826 --> 00:11:00,961
SURE, I MAY HAVE BEEN
TEMPORARILY DAZZLED

228
00:11:01,028 --> 00:11:02,162
BY THE MAGNIFICENT ROGUE,

229
00:11:02,229 --> 00:11:03,497
BUT I'M OVER THAT.

230
00:11:03,564 --> 00:11:06,300
I REALIZE NOW
WHO MY REAL FRIENDS...

231
00:11:06,367 --> 00:11:07,835
AND ENEMIES ARE.

232
00:11:07,902 --> 00:11:12,039
AND I'M NOT GONNA
FORGET IT ANYTIME SOON.

233
00:11:12,105 --> 00:11:13,507
- YELLO?

234
00:11:13,574 --> 00:11:15,409
AS A MATTER OF FACT,
I AM OLD PALS

235
00:11:15,476 --> 00:11:17,077
WITH THE MAGNIFICENT ROGUE.

236
00:11:17,144 --> 00:11:18,713
SUPER! SEE YOU TONIGHT.

237
00:11:18,779 --> 00:11:21,781
WELL, LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S
RIDING THE RED CARPET TONIGHT.

238
00:11:21,848 --> 00:11:23,083
I'D INVITE YOU GUYS,

239
00:11:23,150 --> 00:11:26,786
BUT, FRANKLY,
YOU'RE NOT COOL ENOUGH.

240
00:11:26,853 --> 00:11:28,522
CIAO.

241
00:11:28,589 --> 00:11:30,391
- ACTUALLY, I NEED
TO GET GOING, TOO.

242
00:11:30,457 --> 00:11:34,761
I'M CO-HOSTING A PARTY
WITH THE M-MAGNIFICENT ROGUE.

243
00:11:34,828 --> 00:11:35,578
CIAO.

244
00:11:42,103 --> 00:11:45,038
- I REALLY NEED
TO MAKE SOME NEW ENEMIES.